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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23498473">Anna, Baby~</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alquaniquisse/pseuds/Alquaniquisse'>Alquaniquisse</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drunk Tyelpe, M/M, Modern AU, Unamused Annatar, crackfic, im sorry, not sorry, this is utterly terrible</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 10:20:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>483</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23498473</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alquaniquisse/pseuds/Alquaniquisse</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Based off Tumblr post that was so bad I had to write the scenario out completely. This is a complete joke, but all the same, it was certainly fun to write.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Annatar/Celebrimbor | Telperinquar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Drunk Tyelpe</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Anna, Baby~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/prismatic_starstuff/gifts">prismatic_starstuff</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Blame them.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Annatar hung up his keys and shut the door with a shiver. It was freezing out, and light dusting of snow coated his jacket and what parts of his hair weren’t tucked into his scarf. With a rustle of plastic bags and the sound of bottles clinking together — that must have been the wine, for tomorrow evening’s dinner — he set down the groceries, and unbuttoned his jacket to take it off. “Tyelpe?”</p><p>He heard a giggle down the hall and from the direction of the living room, and did indeed see a shadow dance on the wall opposite the doorway, cast by the fire in the room. Tyelpe must have been standing in the doorway just out of sight. <em>Odd</em>. Annatar rolled his eyes and finished undressing from his outerwear, to then bend over to pick up the groceries once more and bring them into the kitchen. This was certainly strange; Tyelpe wasn’t the giggling type. He was usually quiet and flustered and greeted Annatar whenever he came home with a loving embrace and a kiss, not... this, whatever this was. There! Again, the giggling!</p><p>But now, the giggling was accompanied by something else: music.</p><p>Annatar paused for a moment in an attempt to recognize the tune... then closed his eyes in dread. <em>Not this one.</em> He hated this one, it was beyond terrible, and stood up to turn around and tell his partner so. “Turn it off, this is terri—”</p><p>His words died in his throat.</p><p>
  <em>Oh, no.</em>
</p><p>Tyelpe was now in the hallway, leaning against the wall with a wide, dopey smirk... but that wasn’t what made Annatar choke — it was the cheap, likely Target-bought, red-and-green (and covered with bells) Christmas elf costume he wore, that was much too small for him.</p><p>It only took Annatar a second to deduce that Tyelpe was completely drunk.</p><p>Before he could do anything about it, Tyelpe stepped forward in time with the music, swaying a little on his feet. “Anna, baby~ ”</p><p>
  <em>No, ohhhhh no...</em>
</p><p>“Slip a few rings out of the forge, for meee~ ”</p><p>By this time, Tyelpe was right in front of him. “Tyelpe, what are you—"</p><p>“Been an awful good elf, Anna, baby~ ” His arms looped round Annatar’s shoulders and he leaned on him heavily, their noses almost touching. Annatar wrinkled his. “So hurry to the bedroom, tonight...” He pressed his nose to Annatar’s, and then broke off in another fit of giggles and hiccups.</p><p>“<em>Tyelperinquar, you are drunk!”</em></p><p>That certainly didn’t stop Tyelpe. “Anna, <em>baby</em>, a silver hairnet with jewels, too, light blue... I’ll wait up for you, dear, Anna, baby, so hurry to the bedroom tonight~ ” He leaned forward even more and messily kissed Annatar, who returned the kiss, if only out of a sense of obligation.</p><p>“Do not call me ‘baby!’”</p><p>“<em>Anna,</em> <em>baby~ </em>”</p><p>Annatar groaned, burying his head in Tyelpe’s shoulder. This was going to be a long night.</p>
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